The Extortionist Laverie

You will NEVER guess how much it costs to wash one load of clothes here in Romans. NEVER! Guess? Guess?

Ok, I'll just tell you. But let me just preface by saying that it only costs $0.75 to wash a pretty big load in America (or at least in the UF residence halls). Furthermore (I'll just do the math for you), it costs me $5 to wash AND dry THREE loads of clothes. Whites. Darks. Colors.

3.90 EURO!!!!!!!

Today, on October 31, 2007, the equivalent of this, according to Yahoo! Finance, is $5.6421. To wash one small load. Extortionists. Needless to say, I only washed one load and mixed darks with whites, delicates with cotton, just stuffed it all in there untill there was hardly any room left.

I figure it's due to the scarcity of water in these whereabouts. I mean, these people don't even have water fountains at the gym or in school. At the teacher's lounge in one of my schools, they ask for a ten-cent donation if you're gonna take one of those cone cups of water. Due to this justification, if you can even call it that, I thought it was pretty reasonable that it only costs 50 Euro cents to dry a load. It doesn't use any water, so why would it be more? Makes perfect sense.

What DOESN'T make sense is why the dryer stopped working after 5 minutes. I thought this had to be a mistake, so I put in another 5o cents, and pressed START once more. And sure enough, the dryer stopped 5 minutes after that. I asked some crazy French lady that kept taking to herself if this was normal, and she replied with a "bah, ouiiii." Times like these, I miss home!

My clothes is now hanging in the living room, clothespins and all. And I thought clothespins were only used for arts and crafts projects nowadays. Little did I know!

Job #2

I got a second job! I will be babysitting two little French kids, ages 4 and 10. Tomorrow, I will meet the family and the kids. Me and another assistant posted some signs in the teachers lounge and one of the professors got back to me. I wonder how much I should charge, considering the fact I have NO money....

I'm glad I got this job because I will be around French children who can probably talk slowly and teach me a child's vocabulary. Then I can take that and teach it to my little sister, Madeleine! Madeleine already knows some french words, like "du lait," "de l'eau," "jus d'orange," "du pain," "s'il vous plait" and "mademoiselle." You know, five basic phrases to survive. She has an interest in French at such a tender young age and it's completely forced upon by me self-motivated. So proud of that little rascal.

Did That Viejo Just Outrun Me?

It's amazing to me how active the over-the-hill population is in this region of France. As I walk to school every morning, the majority of speedy bike riders zooming past me are 62-year-old ladies with calves hard as a rock pedalling with the power of a 15-year-old over the many hills. Insanity! You would NEVER see that in America. The elderly just stay at home, watching TV and sipping slowly on soup. It's a chore to walk from one room to another.

At the rock climbing gym on Wednesday, I saw a man that I SWEAR could not possibly be a day younger than 75. He climbed the inverted wall in less than 2 minutes. This is the same wall I was working on for over a half hour and ended up not being able to finish. From a distance, I could admire every one of his tight leg muscles outlined with each sharp move, as well as his shiny old hairless head and poofy white beard. And then I looked around me. The majority of the people climbing were adults or the elderly. None of this college and high school student thing you see at GRG (the rock gym in G-Ville). So weird.

I want to be like these people when I reach retirement. I don't want to be an old heap of wrinkles and gray hair slumped over a bed. I want to be able to walk everywhere in a cute skirt, showing off my experienced and muscular legs, despite my ripe age.

For Shits and Giggles

Today was a funny day. I spent the majority of the time laughing. Days like these are always good.

I laughed when I asked my students to locate Miami on the map and in every single class without fail, they went straight to California. And New York? It's right in the center near Oklahoma.

I laughed at some of the ridiculous haircuts I've seen. The mullet is in, y'all! There was one guy on the train that had a mullet, a faux hawk, AND gelled bangs--all at once! And the mullet doesn't discriminate; it plagues the females, too.

I DIED laughing when my roommate got locked in the toiletroom (the toilets are separate from the bathroom). She was there for like 15 minutes and because I was laughing so hard, I had absolutely no energy to save her. The thought of her living over a toilet in such confined spaces (about 1.5' x 2') for the rest of our time here was absolutely hilarious. Especially since she's counting down the days till her boyfriend of TEN years (YES, TEN) comes to visit. And he would find her trapped in the w/c. lol

And of course, I saved the best for last. My bike got stolen today! Instead of mourning the theft, I just burst out laughing when I saw nothing but the cut lock on the floor by the bike racks. Who would EVER want to steal that shiteous bike? The back tire flattens within seconds, the frame is all banged up, the handlebars were gonna fall off any day now anyway, and it's just...hideous. It's not easy to ride. I rather walk than bike. Good riddens.

Goals

New goal: Spend less time on Facebook and PerezHilton.com and more time doing more important things with my life.

Aside from the fact that to access the very weak WiFi signal, I must balance my laptop on one leg in a specific corner in my room and this causes my muscles to cramp at times, I really could be doing better things. Like finally finishing "Eat Pray Love" (a great book I bought at the airport and couldn't put down on the plane), putting the last touches on Cami's wedding pictures and giving them to her (the wedding was in June! I feel really bad about this), or speaking French with a conversation partner I have yet to find (another goal). I need to be monitored!

UPDATE: Today, I read like 15 pages of my book! Though I have not really restricted my activity on the aforementioned Web sites, I have increased my intellectual activity overall (reading books, reading the news, writing down new French words and phrases, etc.)

I Live In An Ice Box

It's..........soooooooooooo........COLD.

The heaters don't start working till Nov. 1st. Till then, everyone just has to freeze. Last night, I slept with my coat on, two regular blankets and two fleece blankets, and it still wasn't enough. Tonight, I will sleep with all of the above PLUS gloves, a scarf, a hat, a second pair of pants and a second pair of socks. It must be in the low 40s outside and maybe the high 30s inside.

I miss my Florida sun!

Today, we spent the whole day in the kitchen cooking to keep warm. I nearly joined the potatoes in the boiling pot of water. Instead of using powdered sugar for a recipe, I opted for the solid hard cubes and pouncing on them with the grip of my knife for what seemed an eternity in order to keep moving and (possibly?) sweat. I hope this is just a cold front and not the start of winter!

UPDATE: Thank GOD the heaters started working today. May the lord bless the guy who flipped the switch and saved us from another sleepless, shivering night.

Three Unrelated Points

I felt homesick for like 10 minutes today, but then I got over it.

Also, I have discovered that I'm addicted to chocolate. It's a drug. If I don't get it everyday, I fall into a state of depression and anxiety. Be it in a pain au chocolat, in a brioche, or an actual chocolate bar, I must have it! I'm equally addicted to sugar. Two French ladies scoffed at me when they saw me press "extra sucre" on the coffee machine in the teacher's lounge today. They told me I would die of diabetes. At least I'll die happy!

SNCF (the train company) workers went on strike today. What a surprise: a strike in France. And how did that affect me? Instead of having to get up at 8 a.m., I had to be up before 4 p.m.! Three of my four classes were cancelled because of this, including a 9 and 10 a.m. class, since most teachers don't live in Romans and take the train to work. Thank you, freedom of speech!

THIS Has Made My Day

John Mayer on Wikipedia's main page today!
=) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =) =)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOHN! Wow, the man is 30. He's still got it, though!

Toulon/La Seyne-sur-Mer

I spent this past weekend in Annie and Regis' lovely summer house in La Seyne-sur-Mer, a beach and boating town on the Mediterranean less than 3 miles from Toulon. Needless to say, it was absolutely beautiful. It was hot, sunny and humid the whole time (FLORIDA WEATHER AT LAST!!!!) and I didn't want to leave. We ate outside on the terrace every day with a view of the ocean. You could smell the sea salt in the air.

It was my first time wading in the Mediterranean. It's so blue! Some of the beaches looked like mine back in Miami (with light sand), but other beaches were rocky. It's so strange to think that those rocks are naturally there, that it wasn't some guy that was playing a joke on his buddies a long time ago by filling the area with uncomfortable rocks. Besides going to the beach, we did a little tour of Toulon, ate a lot of good food--as usual, and hiked to the top of a nearby mountain whose name I forget.

To go from La Seyne-sur-Mer to Toulon, you have to take a 15 min. boat ride. It's their form of public transport into the city. Regis told me that the kids that go to school in Toulon take the boat every morning. Strange! Yet so awesome.

On with the photos!

Villard de Lans - Vercors

The Vercors is a national park that's popular for hiking, rock climbing, mountain biking and skiing. A bit like the Appalachian Trail but on a smaller scale. We started off in Villard de Lans, a cute ski town that is deserted for the moment as ski season hasn't started yet. I didn't get to see those caves I mentioned in the last entry, but we did take a beautiful nature hike. Here are some snapshots!

Club Alpin Francais and the Great Outdoors

I FINALLY started rock climbing again, but in doing so, I realized how much my muscles have deteriorated from not having climbed for a month and a half. I've joined the Club Alpin Francais (CAF) and all I need to do to finalize my membership is go to the doctor and get a note from him or her saying I'm healthy.

Climbing indoors in France is so different. They use different belaying techniques and different devices. I felt like a novice all over again. And let me tell you, it was STAAAAANK in that gym. I always defended the French back in America (yes, I now refer to the states as "America") when my friends would talk about the lack of showering practices in France. I take all of that back. I had a guy climbing next to me with his armpit in my face every time he reached for a hold and I wanted to throw up mid-air. It's not just bad B.O. It's a reeking, rotting smell that induces all kinds of disgust from the pits of my stomach. Grosssss.

The lady that I sort of befriended, if you can say that, was nice and really cool. Except she kept using slang words and I could never understand what she was saying. She would also tell me everything in a whisper (the French are really good at that) and I kept thinking she was telling me a secret. But no, she was just telling me how her daughter lost her glasses when she was climbing in a canyon. Why whisper? Are Americans just loud, or are the French discreet for no apparent reason? Or both?

There's already a CAF excursion this weekend to go to the south of Ardeche (the department next to mine, which is Drome) to do some hiking and climbing. Very exciting, we'll see if I go.

For the meantime, I'm supposed to get up in 7 hours (I should be sleeping now!!!) to go hike in the Vercors tomorrow with two other American assistants . We're going to explore some caves, I think, and just get out there to the heart of the mountains that we only see from a distance. I shall post pictures upon arrival.

You Are Here

Maybe I should've done this earlier...

This is a map of France and very carefully yet boot-leggedly marked is where I live. As you can see, it's in a valley between two mountain chains. Click on the map to enlarge.

UPDATE: It's hard to see, but to orient yourself, Paris is in the north central region of France in the Ile-de-France region. Lyon, the second biggest city in France, is just northwest of Romans.

Rugby and the French

Yesterday, France played against New Zealand in the Rugby World Cup. In school on Friday, I took a poll of the class to see how many people thought France would win. About two people raised their hand. Everyone else said France didn't have a chance, that they suck, that they shouldn't even try, that it would be an embarassment, that they weren't even going to bother watching because New Zealand, a very strong team, would obviously win.

Well whatdja know...France won! Of course, everyone at the bar I was at went ballistic, jumping on the tables and chanting the electric guitar tune of "Seven Nation Army" from the White Stripes (Why? I have no idea. It's like their fight song or something). Bunch of bandwagon fans. Nobody had faith and France ended up winning after all.

It was a fun experience being in France for any sort of a world cup just to see how the French celebrate. They don't celebrate to the rate that us Gators did when we won all the championships (the first, second and third time). An hour after the game, everything had settled and Valence felt like a ghost town. If it was us Gators, we'd be out there till the cops came out to shoo us off the streets. I guess the French are more discreet in that aspect.

Shiz

I've officially been welcomed to France by the elegant elderly women walking their pretentious poodles. How?

I finally stepped on dog doo doo on the sidewalk today. Poo!

The Cold Hard Truth

My first week of teaching is officially over. Because I have so many different classes (12 hrs. a week, 1 hour per class, never the same students), I've pretty much done the same thing with all of them. I've asked them to tell me, without reservations, what their true image of America is. We then would discuss the stereotypes and determine whether there was truth to any of them or if they had a skewed view of us. Here's what they thought:

1. Americans are fat. Everyone only eats McDonald's.
2. America is dangerous and there are gangs everywhere.
3. All Americans encounter celebrities on a regular basis.
4. America is a rich country, but there's a lot of rich people and a lot of poor people.
5. Tony Parker is famous in America too, isn't he?
6. High school is just like the movie "High School Musical" and pom-pom girls (what they call cheerleaders) rule the school.

As far as Miami is concerned, here is their image of my city:

1. Everyone walks around in bikinis.
2. Miami is a surfer town.
3. There are alligators everywhere.
4. The only thing to do in Miami is go to the beach.
5. Miami and Malibu are the same thing, or at least on the same coast.

Their image of the US is either really negative or really glamorous. They either hate us or think we're cool because a large part of their entertainment (movies, music, TV shows, etc.) comes from America. I broke down each stereotype down for them and explained how things really are. I think they learned a lot and maybe even have a bit more respect for Americans, maybe.

And the french Tony Parker is only famous in the states because he married Eva Longoria.

I Am NOT Happy....

... about this:

John Mayer and Minka Kelly (that bitch)

I leave the country for a minute and he's already cheating on me! Men are scum!

Parliamo italiano!

I'm so happy that I live with an Italian. I don't know if I've mentioned it yet but I live with a 24-year-old Italian girl named Rosangela. She's great! And she's teaching me Italiano. She's never taken a French class--how brave of her to move to a tiny town in France where no one speaks Italian! I'm helping her with her French and she's teaching me Italian. We've made labels for household things in both languages. My favorite word she's taught me is "chocolatini." It means a little piece of chocolate, or a chocolate chip. I also learned to count to 14...the rest of the numbers will come to me soon enough. And of course, I already learned all the bad words as I am reading a book about an American woman in Italy and in one of the chapters, she's at a soccer match and the profanities coming out of a fan's mouth sound like sweet-nothings to her--music to her ears. So I read that part of the book aloud to Rosangela but she wasn't very pleased. Oops.

I hope to get pretty decent and then visit Italy with her. She has invited me to Bari (the town she's from in the south of Italia) for Christmas so maybe I'll come. Andiamo a Italia! Prontissimo! Ooh that reminds me of something else I learned from her: they answer the phone saying, "Pronto?" Everything sounds so lovely in Italian. :)

The Golden Arches

I committed a huge sin today. An almost-crime. Something I vowed to NEVER do…..

I ate at a McDonald’s in France.

I don’t even like MacDo (as they call it here) and I never eat it back at home, unless there’s absolutely nothing else. But I had just finished biking (yes, biking—did I mention that I got a free bike? :) miles and miles, over hills and under bridges, and I was very thirsty. And all I could see on the horizon were those damned golden arches, so I asked for a large Coke. And then I felt dumb just asking for a drink so I ordered Chicken McNuggets, too. They were like, gourmet chicken nuggets. Geez, does fast food also have to taste better here? AND they brought the food to my table and told me “bon appetit” upon setting the tray in front of me.

This McDonald’s is behind one of the schools I’m teaching at, and I saw that there’s free unlimited WiFi there. So it looks like I’ll be revisiting McDonald’s very soon, ugh.